Check out the five lads we know you'll definitely find in Ibiza this summer:
THE LONE RANGER
You know how it goes: you're on a night out, having a laugh with your mates, and suddenly you notice someone hanging about that you don't know. It's the solo rider. He possibly started the holiday with friends but he's alone now, and he's looking to get in with your group. He doesn't have any money, but if you're lucky he'll treat you to the tale of how he's been "finding himself" out there on his own (before asking you for a sip of your beer).
Likely to be found: Wandering the strip.
Fun fact: Any money that he did bring, he spent on the first night.
There is a 100% chance that you will run into this guy, whether it's at the hotel, on the beach, or when he makes a beeline for you on the strip as you debate which club to enter first. His tattoos tell a story of the ten years he's been working as a rep, and he can't even remember what it's like to not wear flip flops. Ask him about the wildest night he's ever had working as a rep, because that'll be a story!
Likely to be found: Hanging around the pool showing off his tickets.
Fun fact: He says he's 24 when he's actually 32.
THE WANNABE PLAYER
This #LAD has to wear an England kit at all times to show off the fact that he's British. He's also got a lot of stories to tell (most of which involve girls he conveniently can't remember the name of) although none of them are true. A ladies man (in his own head), he'll try and chat up every girl he comes across, but the only number he'll be coming away with this summer is the one on the back of his shirt.
Likely to be found: Prowling a nightclub.
Fun fact: Did you know he was once scouted for Manchester United reserves but turned them down because he'd show everyone else up?
THE ARCHBISHOP OF BANTERBURY
This poor guy is on his first lad's holiday, and no he didn't know what he was in for. Go easy on him, he'll likely have lost a bet because he fell asleep on the first night, so that'll explain the tattoo. He's also forbidden from removing his team polo shirt for the entire holiday, for the quality bants.
Likely to be found: Orchestrating chants on the dance floor.
Fun fact: He's taken a holiday bucket list but achieved none of it.
THE CHEEKY BARMAN
Granted, you'll see more than one of this guy, probably a hundred. His club is the best that side of Ibiza (according to him), with the biggest DJs and the cheapest drinks. He'll tell you he has an exotic name in a vaguely Spanish accent, when really his name's Phil and he only left Yorkshire for the first time a couple of months ago.
Likely to be found: Behind the bar. Obv.
Fun fact: He can make you any drink you want if it contains the same four things. And he'll set it on fire.
Illustrations by @tomiistudio